Sustainable Agriculture Gifts

'I think I'll get me a hybrid.'

The consequences of messing with nature

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

HELLth Food Sprouts

Old MacDonald had a genetically modified farm.

"Free-range chicken meets grass-fed cow..."

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

Intensive farming

Here, we're a dime a dozen. In America, growing rice organically, we'd be something special.

French Farmers - "Is this feed approved by ze soil association? - "Oui, ze night soil association."

'this is the only place where no one is fooling around with the genes.'

Water and agriculture

"I'm switching the farm from dairy to organic crops only. You'll have to work a lot harder to earn your keep."

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"Is the MSG local?"

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

Diner

The Velvet Mesquite

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

If we build raised beds and a compost bin now

'We like to keep our supply chain short.'

How's this mulch for improving my soil? Not good. It's full of toxic wood chips. They poison the dirt and don't decompose. Just what I need. Subprime loam.

All our servers are locally caught from a sustainable source — the actors' academy across the street.

"Would you care to see a YouTube of your chicken when it was free ranging?"

'Could I have the traditional Christmas dinner but without meat or dairy and could guarantee it's organic and GM free.'

City Zoo: 'Try our exotic composts in your garden.'

Hydroponic Gardening

'My only consolation is that by eating us they're killing themselves.'

'Real? No. They're all made out of soy and tofu. We wanted to crack the meatless industry up a few notches.'

"How about you? Were you 'locally raised'?"

Farmer holding a raining cloud over his crops with a piece of string