Suspense Addict T-Shirts

'I'm hear one of these guys is a certified mind reader, and I think I know who it is.'

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

Crane Game. Ball Game.

Starvation Watching

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

"He did it!"

'... And that's where I'm seeking planning permission to build a secret uranium enrichment plant...'

"What makes you think this could be a suspect package?"

"He didn't slip on even one of those peels..."

Good cholesterol cop, bad cholesterol cop. Rice cake? Eat the donut punk.

Reading room

Janet Leigh

"Alright, I'll talk. Just please, stop with the good-cop, ab-cop routine."

'This is DESTROYING my manicure, Steve!'

At Mary Higgins Clark's book club.

"Get ready."

"Now, see here, I've been wronged! Some no-good do-nothing rat pack got me sick, and I gotta know who!"

"So have you been watching Bridgerton?"

June Brown

"This is too hard, but I'd recognize him on his own."

Angular monster attempting to lure Norm into his maw with tongue shaped like a sexy woman.

'So, were we entertained tonight, or just bludgeoned into submission?'

'How much longer are you two going to practice the theme music from 'Psycho'?'

"To verify you are the person who answered the phone, May I have your social security number and a major credit card."

"The DNA does not lie Mrs Miggins...or should I call you Don Escobar Bolivian drugs czar?"

"Hey fellas! I think I've just invented a new football game."

'No. 5, please step forward, open your coat, and say, 'ho, ho, ho.''

Late one night at the SETI project. 'Don't make us come over there!'

'Go ahead and throw in the monkey wrench, Sims. The suspense is killing us.'

A Cow watching a horror movie.

Yes, the results of your blood test came back, Mr. Fusco. But they're for me to know, and you to find out. ! !