Sushi Satirist Pillows

"I'm trying to stick to a Paleo diet. Do you think cavemen had wasabi sauce on their sushi?"

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Honest Vending

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"Don't worry about it now, but I'll need that hook back when you're done."

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

'Have you any W fronts?'

Edna, I fear our love doesn't have a future... My parents would eat you!

The Inventor of the Man Bun!

'Secondhand smoke.'

'Today's entrees are the Breast with Thyme, and the Wurst with Thyme.'

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

Jewish man walks into a restaurant called 'Oy Sushi'.

"Gap... Tony Soprano fit"

The Lavender Dot - Part Five

'Waiter, is it raining?' ] 'Sorry, not my table.'

Home for the Holidays

'For obvious reasons the chowder's made with chicken and pork.'

"Riddle your salad with pepper, sir?"

'Instead of one of our dishes you want to eat me? Just a minute, sir.. I've go to ask the manager.'

Stay at home

The Humpback Whale . . . or as the Japanese call it, sushi.

Luke Warm & Over E-Z: The World's Blandest Rappers.

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

"I'll only remove what's necessary...your gall bladder and the man bun."

"A Mister 'Ty Gurr' wants to reserve a table next to our fattest customer."

"May I be candid, Hogarth? I should have thought a shrimp girl would make a more appropriate subject than a girl shrimp."

"Simply put, our 'Nostalgia Special' is the 'Catch' of yesterday."

The latest fall fashion trends

Holy cow. Holycow. Holycow. What? You won't believe the American hero coming to the cafe. Lady Gaga? Kanye? Elon Musk? A venture capitalist. Do I look greedy enough in this shirt? I weep.

The PARTISAN CAFE: "For or against section?"

Cocaine discovered in British marine life. . . Shrimp Coketail

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

The Three Stylish Klansmen