Survival Storyteller Gifts

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

'Dear Diarrhea, Day 84. Well, I'm constipated again today...'

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

"Caught another one!" "Let's eat!"

'If we hadn't outsourced the staff, we could've eaten them.'

Robinson Crusoe's blog.

Odysseus starts regretting his return to Ithaca.

'Rubbing sticks together was a great idea. After 40 minutes, I'm so warm I don't need a fire!'

'I'll call you Friday, there's a one in seven chance that's the right day of the week.'

'I forgot to cancel the milk!'

Magazine stand in middle of the desert.

After 73 days, the coconut would finally be his.

What? I had to fire our flare gun at him before he fired his flare gun at us!

'If it wasn't for you darling - I think I would go crazy!'

'Bottled water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!'

'I wish I'd never seen Lost, now.'

"Holy water, holy water...."

"Look, we're all thirsty. You don't see me whining about it."

Early detection was rarely helpful.

"I lost my way and wandered through this white hell for five days before your brave rescue dog found me and saved me from starving to death!"

"Maybe we should follow that guy..."

'Just when you think things can't get any worse, it starts to rain.'

Martin Gray.

Australasia.

'What luck. It's Kosher.'

"It was at this point St. Paul felt like he could not catch a break!"

"For the last time — there is no ‘other woman’!"

Deflating Island

"For those missing years, I refer you to my book 'Lost in Tanzania.'"

Message in a bottle.

Suddenly Billy realized that his grandma was right...Now that he was grown up, he did have to beat the women off with a stick.

'Wow, it's lucky he shot at you with a rifle and not a shotgun, otherwise, you would have been a goner...'