Survival Enthusiast Gifts

Rescue rations.

'Like I said son, survival is all about location, location, location!'

'We're still not moving!'

'It's my new anti-theft device. -I call it 'The Club'.'

'I'm so proud of you, Brian - This is your fourth day without a cigarette!'

Poison Ivy sign posted on a small desert island.

Last mirage for the next 20 miles.

"I wouldn't—there's an awful lot of scary-sounding legalese."

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

Shark scaring man into mouth.

'...And that's about it- how was your day?'

Coconuts.

'It's called 'stress' - It'll help with natural selection.'

Man in a desert finds a bottle cork.

'Now what?'

'Well we learned one thing today, Harris screams like a girl.'

'No idea, it was like that when I got here!'

'Wow, that shift almost got us.'

'Everyone stay calm and don't make any sudden movement. Ok, men? Men?'

'Meatless Friday.'

Robinson Crusoe - Discovery of the Footprint on the Beach

"Yes Sir! I have just shipped your order."

Vulture Awaits the Castaway's Demise

'And if that's not here in 30 minutes or less, it's free, right?'

Vulture knocking over glass of water: 'Opps!'

'Ooops - here it says 'FIRST cross the desert, THEN eat your camel'...'

'Gasp!.. Boiling water!.. Boiling water! '

Coconut Quest

End of the World

Emergency Exit

"I just can't do anymore leftovers."

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

"Up gets you nowhere."

"Quicksand or not, Barclay, I've half a mind to struggle."

"We're saved, for now, but I wish this were a desert isle instead of a tsunami flotsam."