Surreal Comedy Enthusiast Gifts

'Excuse me sir, What year is it'

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"His first out-of-body experience."

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

Skiing.

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Dog Walking Services

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Intelligent people laugh too!

"I told you playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey was a dumb idea."

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

Clown throws a bucket of confetti over car at 'Jimbo's carwash'.

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

'He has your nose and my ears.'

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

Stand-up Romcom

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

Deer Season Open.

More Reasons To Beware Of Dog