Supreme Court Aficionado T-Shirts

Trump got disqualified in Colorado

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

I love Lawyers

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

Sue The Bastards

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

Elon Musk in fly me to the moon

Ruth Bader Ginsburg

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

Criminal Stupidness

"Not guilty, Your Honor, on the basis of a previously undiagnosed and untreated case of Integrity Deficit Disorder!"

'Your honor, we are appealing on grounds the post-trial book deals didn't match the pre-trial publicity.'

AMERICAN CIVIL LIBERTIES UNION ACLU, HELP TAKE A BITE OUT OF LAW, 'I like it!'

"Not guilty by virtue of reasonable doubt."

'Great. Another trainee lawyer.'

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

Religion and Politics

Judge

"One soft drink and eleven stiff drinks."

"This is a complex matter, we can't keep repeating 'Possession is nine tenths of the law' at the judge."