Superhero Nanny Pillows

'I'm on my way!'

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

Coping with a strong-willed child

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

Soap Versus Coronavirus

"How many times have I told you kids to turn off the light when you leave a room?!"

'Still having trouble finding day care?'

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

'Since it's Mother's Day, we'd like you to take the day off.'

Bizarre sequence of computer-generated random numbers

Childhood Screen Addict

'She let the bedbugs bite.'

'He's at that difficult age: 0 to 16.'

Muscular Dad

'How about wearing a limo driver's cap when taking me to practice?'

Add your kids' ages together...

Covid Vaccine

"You'll have to clean your room by yourself. Your plea for disaster aid has been turned down by the President."

'Hello, parental support hotline? I was able to rise up and become super Mom. How do I get back down?'

"Mommy is taking the nap that you refused to take."

'Look, a cloud from when the climate still worked properly'

'For me, this is actually an improvement; my wife is home with our octuplets.'

'This hospital certainly takes cleanliness seriously.'

'Relax, Silly. He's not here for you.'

Dad reaching into medicine cupboard

"I'll get you a drink of water, but next time, call Dad, not room service."

Mom's Diner - We reserve the right to refuse service to naughty boys!

"I just bought these smart headphones for parents. They mute all sarcastic remarks and complaining from my kids. I programmed them to do the same for my husband."

Potty Training.

'It's a 'Super Nanny' idea'.

'I thought you said you were only collecting fortnightly from now on.'

Still having problems finding day care?'