Sunday Strategist Gifts

'Technically, you do qualify for five weeks of vacation, but your request for 35 Sundays off has to go under review.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Perils of the double play.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

The Other Cooperstown

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"I love fast break business success."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

'Everything is automatic. The coffee turns on at 7:00...They go to work at 7:25 and we go up and get in their bed.'

"If you really must know, Junior, yes, you were a market correction."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

Standard And P****d.

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

'We were in the right place at the right time but, unfortunately, we were in the wrong time zone.'

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

"Last week on 'Top Surgeon' Erica won immunity, while Carl was sent home for killing his patient during routine gallbladder surgery."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'