Sunday School Teacher Gifts

'When I turned the other cheek, it surprised him ... and that's when I let him have it.'

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"We learned about the 10 commandments, but I bet my parents will add a few of there own!"

'Nice try, but Disneyland isn't a foreign mission.'

'Let me get this straight... God wants me to let him save me from what he will do to me if I don't let him save me?'

SUNDAY SCHOOL, 'Before we go any further with this, does it have a happy ending?'

'The good news and the bad news is that Sunday School attendance is up.'

Boy playing and sundayschool teacher

"No, Bobby, Moses did not DOWNLOAD the 10 commandments!"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

After exiting the cave David was hiding in, King Saul felt a sudden draft.

'No, the Tower of Babel wasn't built for better phone reception.'

"Frank, you don't have to dress like that to work in youth."

'Neat! - This sounds like superhero stuff!'

'Hit him again Martha he still hasn't repented...'

'Well, yes, Jennifer -- I suppose Samson WAS sort of like Wolverine.'

"I still think they paid Goliath to take a dive."

'That's God, come to drive them out of the garden of Eden.'

'I just glanced back at Sodom and Gomorrah for a second...'

"OK, Thomas. This is the last form of i.d. I have."

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'This whole Bible thing sounds like a conspiracy theory to me!'

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Jonah met a strange wooden boy in the belly of the whale.

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.

Early Piety

Noah jumps the gun...and brings down three commandments.

"Made it!"

"I mistakenly stood in the doorway when kids sunday school released."

"Just Adam and Eve? - That wasn't much of a dating pool."

'I understand about Adam and Eve and the Serpent, but who's this 'Forbidden Fruit' guy?'

"It's not Mana. It's fruitcake."

"Judas, where did you get these 30 pieces of candy?"

"Is that why Jesus said, 'Peter, you are the rock and on this rock I will build my Church'?"