Summertime Strategist Gifts

'Life gave me lemons so I made lemonade. I guess I should have waited for some sugar.'

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

"I've just barbecued my head again."

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'Hours out here in the freezing cold and not a deer in sight! That's it - I'm going home!'

"I like to stay on top of things."

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

Armchair quarterback/Armchair everything

"I'll see your two and raise you three."

Plane with banner shoots at another.

"Did no one tell you that at this time of year everybody flies south?"

"Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily..."

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

'Hefner is thinking about the off season already.'

"How can I word this Christmas card to my boss without wishing him a merry Christmas?"

I'm starting a lawn-mowing service instead of going to camp. Excellent. Can I have a loan to get started? What for? Gas can, tool cart, mower blade, sharpening and insurance in case I cut off my foot or someone's prized peony. Maybe we can afford summer camp. It's a bargain.

Another thing is that it's really cool in the summer!

The 'Gulf' Coast League.

'How did our ‘Get Away From It All' vacation turn into a ‘Take Most Of It With You' long weekend?'

'After all these years of purposely losing to the boss, I beat the pulp out of him and turned in my resignation.'

'You can get into enough trouble just in Geneva -- no way you're going to a summit conference in LAS VEGAS!'

Annual pursuit of free agents in the off-season.

'We love the environment - we go there every summer.'

"Ken does know that isn't real money, right?"

'Now I can watch what I want, there's nothing I want to watch.'

"Hold on ! Hold on! When you said you'd played this game before at school...."

Eligible Bachelor: 'Shall I follow you up, Annie; or leave myself for Lizzie?'

"It's springtime in our new product department."

'We'll only have a five minute window, everything has to be timed to the last second.'