Sugar Sheriff T-Shirts

"People worry about what they're giving their children."

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

Doughnut Making

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

"Reach for the sky, stranger."

'What kind of filling would you like?'

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

"Say, you were right, Sheriff, this is the best way to keep up with the 'Space-Hopper Gang'."

"I told you, I can’t scratch your belly right now."

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

'Another sad case of an over dose on uncut sugar cereal.'

'I haven't done anything. My ex-wife had those posters printed.'

The Lawman

'If I promise to be good for the next 30 years, can I have some sweets Dad?'

Sheriff.

"I'm not very scary now, but I will be if I don't get candy."

'You dirty, snivelling, low down, arrogant son of a gin-swilling kleptomaniac.'

'Stick em up' Kid plays with gun

"Your chocolate biscuits and cakes are getting smaller - and where's your sweets aisle?"

The modern sheriff.

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

"Frank, how many times do I have to tell you, it's a posse, not a search engine."

Gun Ego

"Belly rubs later, girl. Belly rubs later."

'When I said loosen your buckle and let 'em drop, I was talking about your gunbelt.'

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

"I think you need to enroll yourself in a good two-step program."

"Deputy, round up a posse, I can't find my phone."