Suburbia Strategist T-Shirts

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

"He loves his leaf blower."

Superman flies Batman over a suburban neighborhood.

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"I finally got tenure by publishing a research paper funded by a grant about subsidies."

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

Hard Hat Area/Hard Nosed Area.

Beware of the Lawn

"You're moving into a place where all the parents live well and all the kids test well."

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"

"Quick! Get your gun, Pa! Here come the suburbs."

"This is my stop, Phil, you'll be C.E.O. till Sixty-third Street."

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

Sidewalk the game

Great Urban Sprawl

THE SMITHS/THE JOHNSONS

'I don't care if the pot roast was a little dry, you had no business condemning poor Gloria to hell!'

Country Mouse and City Mouse Meet Suburb Mouse

Poker Moms

Blissful Acres - An Ignorant Community

Police Log from Suburbia Heights in Haiku Form

Titian's Venus of Mamaroneck

Igloo.

"You know what I like about L.A.? We don't have to be interesting anymore."

"The boondocks R us, I guess."

'Looks like they have their own problems with suburban encroachment.'

Mowing the Lawn

"If the Greenlanders don't want to become Americans, Trump can buy our meadow! It's green, too, and we wouldn't have to keep pulling up the weeds!"

Next 5 Exits: Five sprawling suburbs that look so much like each other even WE can't tell the difference any more. Best of luck to you.

"You don’t seem pleased to have a former royal as a neighbor."

Please stand by...for view.

ahhh...peace and quiet...

"'Scuse me, you getting out?"

The Strings on Farm Subsidies.