Subsidy Strategists Gifts

The Strings on Farm Subsidies.

"He loves his leaf blower."

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"I finally got tenure by publishing a research paper funded by a grant about subsidies."

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

Keep the econoimy moving

'You'll learn that our corporate structure is a bit unconventional.'

"...and, if your idea is so imaginative, innovative and original, why aren't our competitors doing it?"

'We can't cut entitlements for federal employees. We're federal employees.'

First United Church of Outrageously Overlimited Credit Card Holders

Eye Off the Ball

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'

"I see your point, but wouldn't it be more fun to spend it while I'm young enough to enjoy it?"

Bored Baker

"It's wonderful, Harry! How late does Neiman-Marcus stay open?"

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"

I think I can...

"Are we afraid of a little competition? Based on the figures, absolutely."

'No. No. Don't bomb them now. Wait until morning, when the birds are singing and the air is alive with a sense of possibility.'

"I need nothing and I want everything."

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

"Call it wishful thinking, but I don't think this peace will last. . . ."

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

Drachme vs Euro

'I simply can't live on what I earn. I can't even live on what I spend.'

'I could be wrong, but I think Frank brought in a ringer.'

'It's similar to the government's system of checks and balances. I write the checks and you try to balance them.'

'...And while everybody's celebrating the big tax cut, we'll sneak in a postage hike!'

US economy-spend or save?