Subscription Enthusiast Pillows

'There goes Methuselah again, cackling about all his lifetime subscriptions.'

"I'm sure it was just an oversight, sir, but your subscription to 'Time' has lapsed."

"It's not exactly shopping. Many companies have my profile, the send me stuff they now I'll like, and they bill me for it."

Packaging Russian Dolls

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

Subpoena-of-the-Month Club

'Spending and consuming - that's my kind of patriotism.'

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"I subscribed to a collector's magazine! It has great interviews with big-time collectors who buy the world's rarest treasures."

"Now paid subscribers will have access to as much free content as non-subscribers."

"I'm increasing your OnlyFan subscription..."

"I'd like to buy your subscription list to check for changes of address."

"When did Charlie switch to a subscription model?" "Sniff my butt"

"Did you join the testimony-of-the-month club?"

"Extra! Extra! Read all about it for free on our website."

"So now, you have to become a subscription service."

"It's not exactly shopping. Many companies have my profile, they send me stuff they know I'll like and they bill me for it."

Our bank account is now behind a paywall...

Struggling Scientist, Please cite my papers.

"You know very well what subscription forms."

"Why, you plagiarized this from our best-selling book 'How to write a good resume'!"

"I love boutique healthcare! I have a great doctor on retainer and I get this great subscription box every month!"

'Stop whining about commitment! I only asked you to go in on a magazine subscription.'

Q & A's How to unsubscribe.

Larry hits a paywall while reading an eye exam chart.

Your Trial Subscription Has Expired.

Peephole in a pile of presents.

"I wonder if you'd like to subscribe to a theory."