Structure Specialist Gifts

Workmen Lifting.

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

D.I.Y with dad.

"This is just a model, but you get the idea."

"Neversource"

"Sign our updated non-compete agreement. It now includes nasty comments on social media."

Scientists building a tower

'That's subsidence Sir Bryan - The charts are over here.'

Don't forget to read the small print.

"Norman doesn't like any loose ends in his contracts, he likes everything tied up tight...it can be a problem..."

'Let me tell you why I'm here...'

Outline; Introduction, Body, Conclusion.

'He's a structural engineer.'

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

"Your NDA prohibits you from talking about my tendency to bark."

'Don't worry - all tall buildings sway a little in the wind.'

"It won the award this year for aggravating the most architects."

"Measuring dulls my creativity."

'The Miracles of Suspension.'

"The building code says we can use structural steel and poured concrete, and we can go 40 stories high - it doesn't say we have to!"

"Oh dear did we neglect to read the contract thoroughly?"

"Of course under the new contract 24 hour cover will be optional..."

'...and this glorious cliff-top property has recently been reduced by fifty per-cent.'

'Why we have architects'

Spider harpist.

'What the large print in this contract gives you, the small print takes away, and then some.'

"By opening this cookie you are agreeing to whatever terms..."