Stretching Aficionado Pillows

Warming up

Take it easy on the stretching exercises!

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

Biceps, muscles and brawn

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

'We're looking for athletic people.'

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

"And what do you do to maintain your cardiovascular fitness, Miss Holt?"

"How long were you in that headstand?"

'Reach up and fold down into Uttanasa.' - 'Notice how you feel both physically and spiritually.' - 'Physically, I feel that my toenails are a bit too long.' - 'Hmmm... okay, what about spiritually?'

"Feeling stupid yet? No? Then keep going!"

Early Exercise Machines

Battery lifting weights

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

Fast Food Dieter

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

'Music & Gym'

Two entrances to a gym; one reads "Actual Exercise" while the other reads "Sit on Equipment and Stare at your Phone."

Prisoner Stretches Before Stretching Torture

"Go ahead, Perkins. I can listen to your report and roll out my hammies at the same time."

'...but you can't keep imagining you're going downhill!'

'Keep fit.'