Stress Relievers Gifts

"What are they complaining about...the work is challenging,interesting, demanding..." "AND we let them do it for 80 hours a week"

'You look like you have a lot on your mind, Jim!'

'To help our brainstorming, John's going to bang his drum and scream at the top of his lungs.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

'Hard day at work, dear?'

Ask not for whom the photocopier jams, it jams for thee.

'I'm worried that I may not be worrying enough about the least of my worries.'

"Well, all I know is he left on vacation to unwind... and he never wound-up again!"

Hell's Angels

Cuckoo bird in office.

Massage therapist inadvertently beats up client.

'Teacher layoffs adverted.'

'He's had a much healthier attitude to our financial woes since he started taking prescription anti-depressants.'

"I always come here when I need to blow of some steam."

"You've bust your hump."

Agency Honesty Day: 'I have no idea what I'm doing.'

"Whoopsie. . . I think I just growled at you."

"One coping mechanism I suggest to deal with uncertain times is to eat as much as you can, gain a lot of weight, and then go have a nap for six months or so."

"When all else fails, blow darts still get their attention."

"I didn't realize how much I needed to get away from that day-care grind."

'Welcome to the Road Rage Restuarant! What the @#&$ do you want?' 'Burger, fries, something heavily caffeinated, and step on it!'

"The survey suggested that overly bureaucratic management is a major cause of staff stress..."

"Your grant application was rejected, and now your back is acting up something terrible. Is that correct, Mr. Lewis?"

"You promised not to bring work home."

Clockdown

What's with all the cameras? They're filming seniors for college field hockey recruiters. I'll never be good enough to get admitted. It's just a game. In the real world. No one cared you even played. Then why do they make us do sports? To take your mind off all the college pressure!

Couples Massage: "Did you remember the body oil?"

"Yes I DO mind being put on hold! I only have a two week life span."

Recipes for comfort drinks.

Where your mind & battle are los

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

Counting ribs

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

We should take a break. Ron's eyes have turned into spinning rainbow wheels.