Stress Reliever Pillows

"And that one's for the relief of anxiety caused by the high cost of medication."

"We're trying to put the fun back into filing taxes."

'My research cover two fields: the behavior of matter under high pressure, and the behavior of scientists under high pressure.'

"It's a panic alarm. It goes off every time management show any interest in another reorganisation."

'Your entire performance review is based on what you do in the next thirty seconds...go!'

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."

'I need a 'parent of three teens'-size glass.'

'Why so tense? First appraisal meeting?'

"Help! I haven't saved enough for retirement!"

Turmoil change.

'When are you going to learn to relax?'

'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'

"It's good to get hammered by something other than the economy."

'I have difficulty setting boundaries.'

'I stopped to smell the flowers. Where's my inhaler?'

'You have the worry lines of a financial advisor half your age.'

Elevator buttons : Rare, Medium, Well done.

Tossing computer into canyon.

"And your repayment period starts...NOW!"

"I'm not sure I need an emergency room - is there a reassurance room?"

'If you now feel like punching someone in the face. . . press five!'

"I'm taking Harvey off Crisis Management."

"I'm taking some time off to get away from the stress. See you in ten years."

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

'Floyd from auditing stopped by to see you. He's in your top right hand drawer.'

"All done with that holiday spirit for another year, are we dear?"

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

Massage parlour offering therapeutic, Swedish, and ego massages.

"I don't know how you do it. If I had your job, I'd go nuts."

'Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we cry, but never do we throw our computers out the window.'

'How was the holiday?'

Tech support...can I help you!

"This being another divisive election year, I'm putting a surge protector on your pace maker."

Christmas party for self employed and business owners

'He's just joking - they've had a long day in surgery.'