Stress-busting Professional Gifts

"N-n-n-n-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

On holiday.

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

"Three weeks until the pitch, LOADS of time!"

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

"When troubles begin to take their toll, it’s nice to take a little stroll!"

A man is in an office, behind him is a glass box containing a glass and a bottle, there is a sign saying 'in case of emergency'

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

"I've got a strict work/life policy at work... Anyone who has a life doesn't work anymore!"

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

'I call it laziness - He calls it stress management.'

'Maybe we did pile too much work on his desk.'

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

"Jerry's blood pressure jumped to a six month high on News of the dollar's weakness."

White flag being waved around bosses door.

"Dude. You seem tense."

"I'm going on a little mental-health walk and you're not coming with me."

"It's bad. He's not even responding to my emails."

'The trouble with success is that the formula is the same for a nervous breakdown.'

"When the doctor said you should get a pet for lockdown I think he meant a cat!"

"I have had three work-related heart attacks, witch shows you that I care about my job."

Grok's Thought Stopping.

'I don't suppose I need to remind anyone that when I use the term 'bite the bullet,' I mean it metaphorically.'

'You've become run down from working too much. Try sneezing on your boss.'

'My best method for relieving stress is to misplace my cellphone.'

'I see Phelps is back from that stress reduction seminar.'

Pre-vacation-burn-out radiology reports.

'Mr Godzilla - you need anger management!'

'I hear they've named a new stress syndrome after me.'

'You're lucky. At least you know your troubles aren't psychosomatic!'

"Yeah, your inner child called. They want a nap, a juice box, and a restraining order." "Ruining whoops, running a country is tough. Maybe I need to relax and channel my inner child."