Street Smart Strategist Gifts

'I'm not writing him out a ticket...you do it!'

Turning away/ spare change -neck brace $10

"I'm warning you, I have a cold!"

Digby's a former airline pilot--- he always looks three ways before crossing.

Muggers.

"I'm smart, but not A, B, or C smart."

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"Stock options for your thoughts."

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

"Quit stalling, Smithers. Where's the SALES chart?"

'I think I know what the problem is!'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

Day trading.

World Economic Crisis.

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

'Hey, the quarter wasn't so bad after all.'

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

"He'll do anything to say in power."

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

Shareholders Meeting: 'Mr Kenny will now take friendly fire from the audience.'

Hedge fund sharks attacking 'The Markets' ship.

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

'The Truth-in-advertising people want us to call ourselves the 'Sluggish Fund Group'.'

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

What happens when the bears are running the market.