Streaming Superstar Pillows

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"Everybody gets a raise."

"It appears that you'll definitely outlive your usefulness."

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"Now, is this the kind of painting your Mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

Open Mike for the spotlight operators

Comedy, Tragedy, Karaoke

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

A dog poops an @ symbol.

STRIP Hambone: Computer addict

"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"We've just crossed the line between binge viewing and OCD viewing."

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

"Just wait until you read my tweets."

'Kid, go out there and play like you're worth 29 million plus signing bonus, buyouts, and endorsement deals. '

'Your standardized test scores are impressive, but we have no standardized jobs.'

'Nobody likes me at school. I need a personal assistant, a trainer and a P.R. firm!'

Just sitting here kicking field goals (smiley face emoji)

The family tradition lives on: I won the Long Jump and the Triple Jump events...

"What's the fun of smelling the Bougainvillea in paradise if I don't smell the envy on Facebook?"

Narcissism Clinic.

"I would suggest watching fewer box sets..."

"How many times are you going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"