Streaming Sage T-Shirts

"I'm talking about the original YouTube video. Not the remake."

"It's a weak pilot, but, if your stick with it, by Season 3 you grow completely numb to the show's quality and just keep hitting Next Episode."

Year 2070: The Last of Generation Coronavirus

John Barth wrote "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story." That he did, little buddy. But what if a person spends most of his life watching tv, films, Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, etc? What if my -- I mean, this person's -- life story is watching other people's life stories? Does that make other people the hero of this person's story? Sometimes I don't know where I end and Kanye begins. That'd be somewhere around Kim Kardashian.

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

Learn Guitar In 6 Easy Lessons: Add another fifty difficult ones!

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

Music producers.

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

"How can anyone remember Cheech and not remember Chong?"

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

The chairman's boat springs a leak: 'Just keep bailing and never mind the wisecracks.'

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'

"Read me back the minutes from the last dip."

Ever notice if you speed-read these cave drawings you invent animation?

Sigh...things wear oud, dust collects, people die... Why can't you just relax and enjoy life? Because one thing really worries me... Reincarnation, right? ou know me too well, woman.

"She died doing what she loved."

'Found it ... Good heavens! It's the size of a soccer ball!..'

"Well the good news is that the new software analysed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product. . ."

'It appears to be a blog clog.'

"It's nice of you to say so, Ben, but somehow the idea of 'Shakespeare in the Park' doesn't really appeal to me."

'Yes, it's a very interesting show, but we really need to talk about all the time you waste watching it - perhaps during the next commercial break.'

Worshiping the TV.

'This is where it gets tricky. I see 3 alternate endings and a director's cut.'

This one needs re-booting!

"It needs more old salt."

"Meaning of life? Oh, you want my brother. Third mountain over on my right. Me, I'm just a hermit."

If Kitschy Film Dialogues Were Really Realistic. . .

Heavenwood

Computer announces to user: 'You now have more files than Al Capone had under his pillow in Alcatraz.'