Strategy Sages Gifts

"Nobody said it would be easy!"

'It took us a long time and a lot of hard work to find out how to stop your down going profits - make more sales and stop wasting money. That'll be 350.000,- Euro.'

"Hey, that's what everyone thinks about the strategic planning department! I've got a crystal ball and we all study the occult! Hah Hah Hah!..."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

'We've just become the biggest corporation in America.. let's celebrate today and begin downsizing tomorrow.'

Team Experiences Cabinet: Productivity, Fun, Goal Setting!

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

Neuro, Biology, Chemistry, Feedback, Psychology, Technology, Physiology Institute

"And, while there's no reason yet to panic, I think it only prudent that we make preparations to panic."

'...your hindsight on this project was far more accurate than his foresight.'

'As chairman, that's my opinion. I propose we table any motion to further discuss this matter. All those in favor say 'aye'. All those opposed say 'bye'.'

"In response to your request for better communications, I'm going to increase my lengthy explanation by 50%."

When cockroaches go unchecked.

'You should agree with me, but not all the time, Try mixing it up a little,'

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

'You'll learn that our corporate structure is a bit unconventional.'

Harris, our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done.

"This looks good, Jim, but we'd better run it by legal, Siri, and Alexa."

'CPA's' evolving into 'Consultants'

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

"Are you working on a vaccine for Covid-19?"

"I've learned a lot in sixty-three years. But, unfortunately, almost all of it is about aluminum."

"It just happens...one day you wake up and you find that your best billable hours are behind you."

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

'Good - we're finally all on the same rampage.'

Psychiatrist interview an irrational number

A successful meeting! Only one member left in a rage shouting obcenities.

SWOTs

'We need to do a better job at whatever it is that we do.'