Storytelling Grandpa Gifts

'In my day, we feared people wearing Safari Suits... Nowadays, we just laugh at them!'

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

"The boys at Jack's Bait & Tackle will never believe this one!"

Roasted

You know you're getting up there in years when your birthday cake requires that extra box of candles....

Retired Canadian t shirt guy.

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

"Well, I have an opening in Cloverdale Mall ... let me hear you say Ho Ho Ho."

"What about the five that fell through?"

"I had a great weekend... My Grandpa talked about the war again and my Dad about his most daring facebook comments!"

'Well, isn't this nice? Three generations all sitting down together.'

'Grandpa, what was manufacturing?'

"Dad's at that awkward age when he knows just enough about computers to really screw 'em up!"

Conservative Leadership Renounces Protectionism

The Final Chapter.

Trout Game

"Let's scoot."

The Golf Gremlin.

"We're looking forward to this little bundle of joy bringing out the worst in each of us."

"Grandma's TV is so old it wasn't made in a foreign country."

'I'm pretty sleepy tonight, Dad - could we just skip ahead to the chase scene?'

Not-so-easy listening...

The Aging of Underwear

"I'm not worried about Wall Street. I've got my money in my mattress."

"Isn't it about time to switch from your warm-weather chair to your cold-weather chair?"

"Jim was a model Dad".

"Edward, you are already more than Christmassy enough."

'When I grow up, Grandpa, I want to be just like you...retired!'

'Y'know it started as a bedtime story he told his kids.'

"It's a fortuitous coincidence that the greatest moments in music history were when I was in high school."

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

'What did you do in the great whale war, grandad....'