Storytelling Grandad Gifts

I got my bad back from an old football injury.

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Prize vegetables.

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

"His first out-of-body experience."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

'But I digress...'

Check out the nice crawdads I have in the bait bucket, George.

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

Local Knowledge

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

Thomas Mann.

"You go on in, I’m just going to catch up with the moon for a few minutes."

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

"Feel free to take notes."

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

Bite out of fishing pier.

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

Gardener attacked by plants.