Storybook Sleeper T-Shirts

Rip Van Winkle, "He's survived the operation, now he's sleeping peacefully."

"And they both lived happily ever after up until the moment their meds wore off."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Late night teddy reading

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Night-time halo

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

"Ever since you changed from a frog to a Prince you seem a little jumpy!"

"Where the wild things were."

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

“If I start pressing these, I’ll never ever ever get out of here.”

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

Litterary Dogs.

Sleeping Beauty

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

'He said he won't give me a new heart unless I change my lifestyle.'

'Then Jack told his mother they were getting out of the dairy business and going into crop production.'

Grimm's Fairytales - Title Page

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

'Sorry I'm late - I was stacked up at the airport.'

Interpretive napping

'She said she was made out of sugar and spice, so I bit her.'

"The time has come to talk of many things; of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of double-entry bookkeeping, too."

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

Giant to librarian: 'Excuse me, do you have a large print version?'

Sun and the Moon step out.

'So then. The handsome p.c. noticed that the tax disc on Cinderella's pumpkin carriage was well out of date.'

Rhinemaidens tease Alberich