Storybook Lover Gifts

'Big bad wolves not withstanding, this area isn't zoned for residential brick structures.'

'Bad news everyone! The Ark didn't turn out as I expected.'

Frogs french-kissing a princess.

Upon returning from Oz, the Tin Man receives some bad news from his doctor.

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair...'

It was a cold winter for Gepetto.

'Between the two of them, they left you three bales of hay and six bundles of sticks.'

'This is my forth time through the line - she can't tell us apart.'

'The surgeon prepared for another routine keyhole operation.'

"Shouldn't you be reading that to me out loud or something?"

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"

"Let's raise it as one of our pack. That way we can be sure it grows up to be a fierce environmentalist."

'If straw and sticks don't appeal, I do have something in brick that might interest you.'

Maid Marian.

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Goldilocks's plan to try the same thing at the three panda's house backfires.

'So then. The handsome p.c. noticed that the tax disc on Cinderella's pumpkin carriage was well out of date.'

Cheshire cat meets cheshire mouse.

'Reserved' (presumably for little miss muffet)

'I've had to downsize because because of the credit-crunch!'

Pinocchio receives IV of cellulose

"Rapunzel, you've let me down, you've let your mother down, and now you've let your hair down."

"Mummy was right: - I should've married the dragon...!"

"So it's agreed, she keeps the castle and you get to see the tadpoles every second weekend."

Little Red Riding Hood Meets Goldilocks Meets Hansel and Gretel

"I'm starting to regret that haircut."

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"If that's my only option, I'd rather go without."

"The time has come to talk of many things; of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of double-entry bookkeeping, too."

"So, you went up the water spout and the rain came down and washed you out. How did you feel about that and what did you do?"

"You next fattened child could be your last."

"My real son was made of wood."

"Yeah yeah, you went to Oz when you were a little girl and the rest of your life has been a bitter disappointment."

"Yeah, what the heck, we'll let conscience start being our guide tomorrow."