Storybook Escapades Gifts

"Daddy has to clear his head for a few minutes before he can deal with 'Babar'."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Late night teddy reading

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Bookworm Sleepover

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

Need a Qualified Adult for Pooh Sticks

"Ever since you changed from a frog to a Prince you seem a little jumpy!"

Little Princess.

"Where the wild things were."

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Treasure Island Book.

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

Cupid

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

Sleeping Beauty

'He said he won't give me a new heart unless I change my lifestyle.'

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

Grimm's Fairytales - Title Page

Alice Through the Looking Glass - 'Tickets Please!'

"Fellow graduates, when I look at you, I see future princesses, ninjas, wizards, superheroes, and zombies."

Many princes attempted to wake Sleeping Beauty, before one of them simply kissed her'

'...And the mama bear's porridge was frozen solid....'

Child buys 'Dracula doll': Keep in box until sunset.