Story-time Strategists T-Shirts

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

A Hole in the Dike

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

'Charlotte's Website' ('The children's book classic rewritten for the electronic era!')

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

"Skip the funny voices tonight—O.K., Dad?"

Internet Cafe.

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

'I'm glad you're reading my night night story. Dad being a tax attorney only reads chapter 11.'

"And after the prime rate declined by half a point, the Dow rose by thirty-two, guess what happened to Goose and Fox?"

Artist and the artist's model both thinking of the money.

"Oh, you don't need to fight them—you just need to convince the pitchfork people that the torch people want to take away their pitchforks."

"Our market research predicts this product mascot will be irresistible to both men and women..."

'Why do I always have to be the one to connect the dots for you people?'

Videographer. Zoom in. Zoom out.

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

"No offense Dad, but is this available on DVD?"

Outer Cuteness vs. Inner Cuteness

'I know.. Let's write a song all about the evils of material wealth. After all, that last one netted us a bloody fortune!'

Woman in booksotre looking at books labeled 'Highly Graphic Novels.' Covers of books show various charts, graphs, spreadsheets.

"...and although the tortoise was severely speed-challenged, he achieved his sales quota through a strict goal-specific program."

"...and then the heroic young investor managed to capture the evil high interest rate monster and wrestled him down until he was a mere 5.25%!"

"Spoiler alert – it's gonna end like it did the other 117 times."

"I marked the sections where your total contempt for humanity loses its pathos."

"Maybe little Jack Horner became argumentative because he was backed into a corner, leaving him no options."