Store Employee Pillows

'We have a P-O-P display for our new perfume. Can we move the beef jerky down a smidge?'

'This must be the work clothes section.'

'I need a new scent.'

'This anti-ageing cream is well past it's sell-by date!'

Open 24 hrs

"Just groceries? Oh I see..."

'Have you got one that will hold a pizza?'

'In this aisle I'm a real fortune teller - I 'NO' all.'

Counter culture is friendly:'Have a great day!'

"I know what you're thinking...but I think I'm good at what I do."

"You hire only 'All-American' people?"

"There's very little an individual store can do about rising food prices, Mom!"

Sale! Weed Whackers

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit, today, sir - a ream of paper and a half-dozen pencils.'

Bookshop: Unpopular Economics

Hand sanitizer

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'We loved this book. Twenty nine experts tell you how to think independently.'

Cook in the cookery section.

"Hey, Al! What do you know about shelf life?"

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

"I really like this one – but I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

'Why am I not surprised that this section is always the most disorganized?'

'Somebody keeps snapping all the stud boards in half. Anybody know anything about this?'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"It's also a flat-bed scanner."

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

"We've decided to give you a bonus, Rick. It's any change you find under the cushions."

"Do you have anything by The Damned."

'Where do you keep the elbow-grease?'

'I want to buy a self help eBook. Can you help me to download it to my eBook reader?'

Men's Prayer Group.

"The boss is mad at me. I did something really, really dumb today!"