Stone Head Storyteller Gifts

Moai reading a book

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

After 39 years, 11 months, 28 days, Moses finally received the GPS he ordered from Amazon.

"Wheel, schmeel—check these babies out!"

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

OOG & SONS HUNTING & GATHERING

'AAAARGH!...Get it off! Whatever the hell it is...Get it off!'

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

'If you want to see my resume, it's on my cave wall.'

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

"You said getting to the air B&B would be quick, I didn't think you meant this quick!"

Infographics: the early years.

'I was fixin' to fill you full o' lead, Clanton, but it looks like that there stalactite done the job for me!'

'Wine? Okay. I really don't care what you call it; let's invite over the two sisters from the cave next door.'

'We'll never understand these kids. It's the old evolution gap.'

Early man learns that by walking upright, his hands become free to do many useful things.

Mammoth Posing

"I spy with my little eye..." "The ocean! It's always the ocean!"

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

'It's the Mesolithic Age? - But I just got used to the PALEOlithic!'

'Do you mind if I share your post on my wall?'

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

"I don't know. He just said he had discovered something and we had to come over and see it."

"Comments are turned off."

'Don't believe everything you read.'

"Chapter three: Homo erectus and the practical use of bones..."

"I love it!"

Prehistoric son going "Baroooom...Barooom!" on dad's stone wheel

Eurydice in prison

Looks like the Oggs are having a party.'

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

"Nothing is funny. We're just having a good laugh."