Stock Shark Whisperer Gifts

Next year will be a good time to buy tech stocks. The tip of the iceberg.

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Local Knowledge

Bite out of fishing pier.

'You lifted your head.'

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

"My family has been fishing these waters for nearly 40 years. . ."

Ice fisher.

"River well stocked this year."

Man fishing with large bait

Man listening to seashell: 'Oh, Rub-ber Ducky, you're the one ...'

"Say Bernie, how come this little guy's been following you around all week?"

Wolf Karaoke

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

Turtle Hat

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

'Is this river good for fish?' - 'Yes, so good the refuse to leave it.'

Reverse psychology

Lady to man taking picture of fish: 'Wiggle him a little and get him to smile.'

Fish swimming by fishermen's feet - 'This looks like a safe place.'

"Where are you going? I said we need to talk."

"I think it loves us."

'Why do I need to clean the fish? -- Didn't you just take them out of the WATER?'

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

Fish want out of polluted river.

"Here's the deal, throw me back and I won't text your boss telling him you called in sick to fish."

Man fishing in goldfish bowl - "Its always been the same with you Norman.. No ambition."

Dream On: Fish jumping into boat, whilst fisherman says 'Golly, guys! Can't you wait until I get my tackle box open?'

'Before we staqrt biting do you practice catch and release?'

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

'It's the newest thing out. A big screen fish finder.'

'There. See? Your buddy is OK. Now show us our guy before we make the swap.'