Stick Pun Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Ha! I love slapstick comedy."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

'Oi! You threw that on Porpoise!'

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"Doc, you'll be glad to know I'm comfortable in my own skin today. I shed my old in the reception room."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

"Did that pig that went wee, wee, wee all the way have have foot and mouth?"

Rattache

Cake News: Britain Desserts EU

"There weren't any more clown fishes at the pet shop, so they got me - a jester fish."

"We're not a school. We're a political action committee!"

Doctor to Pinocchio: 'I'm referring you to a tree surgeon.'

'Yes, he plans to accept his party's nomination but first I have to accept his apology.'

Fresh Blood In Politics

'Well, call it 'diet stocks'. Your bank account won't get fat because of the dividend income.'

That's not what they mean when they say that Dick Cheney knows where all the bones are buried.

"Oh, that's right next year is an election year..."

"No, I'm afraid I don't know how much wood a woodchuck could chuck." "We're beavers."

'I get a lot of job offers..'

Four More More Years

'I can't come out and play because I'm in 'Time-Out.' Although here at Grandma's it's more like 'Time-Out Lite.' '

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

"Like most of your proposals Pinkley ...it ain't gonna fly!"

America's funniest campaign promises...

The first and last time a Democrat and Republican voted for each other.

OBAMA, 'Because left is the new right!'

"Read my lips!"

No parking here. You will be toad.

'So, Cameron and Clegg have formed a coition.' - 'Sorry, coalition.' - 'Reminder to self. 'No more cheese before bed time.''

"The Dalai Llama."