Animal Pun Aficionado T-Shirts

"I'm not sad, just a little melon collie."

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

"There must be dogs in heaven. Haven't you heard of a St. Bernard?"

Rabbit spraying 'Hare Spray' on head.

'I get a lot of job offers..'

"All I'm saying is the ark would have been a lot more fun if we had brought dates."

''What's the point of big chompers, we swallow everything whole!"

"Like most of your proposals Pinkley ...it ain't gonna fly!"

"I'm Eggspecting."

"My paw's getting tired. Is your paw getting tired?"

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"She's a dachshund-lemming mix."

"Doc, you'll be glad to know I'm comfortable in my own skin today. I shed my old in the reception room."

'Oi! You threw that on Porpoise!'

Vet to owner about dog with bird at chest: 'I suspect heartworm.'

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

"Leapfrog is the latest craze among the kids, but experts say it contribute to declining birthrates. Find out why � after the break!"

The Bear Fax.

Australian Mobile Bar

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

'That was nice of them to order us a new scratching post!'

'If it's any consolation, I'm having him fixed next week.'

"You can achieve anything if you put you mind to it."

"This isn't what I had in mind, when you said you were going to buy me some waterfront property."

'He's not big enough to use the toilet yet.'

"Do you think Papi will let us have a puppy?"

Doctor to Pinocchio: 'I'm referring you to a tree surgeon.'

"The deal looks cut and dried to me but Haskins smells a rat."

'Look, I don't want any funny business.'

"No conifering, please."

It's just not going to work. I'm looking for a mole with more tunnel vision.