Stay-at-home Sloth Gifts

'Let me guess - you wife is still visiting her sister.'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

"That's Reubens, he's an alternate lifestyle coach."

"You know what I wish? I wish there was a foundation that gave grants just to lie fallow for a year or so."

'So the yoga classes are working out pretty well for you then?'

'I follow my doctor's orders religiously. He said for me to spend two hours a day on the tennis court.'

"I don't think they had you in mind when they invented the mobile device."

"No one quite knew what Bob did to earn a crust...rumour had it he was a biologist...with a special interest in sloths!"

"There you are, dear. . . that's you all set to watch satuday night television now!"

"Why am I flicking channels? Every channel's the sloth channel."

'Speaking of ground sloths.'

'Hey! You forgot the TV!'

"We suck at this."

"After the shark documentary there's a documentary on about two fat slobs who watch TV all day. Sounds good"

'I know you're a deadly sin and everything, but I don't know...I still like hanging around with you anyway.'

'You can take the bed, I'll be fine in the cupboard for the night...'

'You've heard of a couch potato? Well he's a mouse potato.'

"So now you're reading a book?"

"People change."

"Sorry for the delayed response. It's been a crazy week."

"Of course it's no trouble. George will put the ketltle on."

'He wants us to wake him when something comes on that's aimed at his demographic.'

'I don't know how you kids can sit around all day watching this garbage on television.'

Summer To Do List. . .

'Winning the Lottery hasn't changed him one iota-he's still the same old,fat,bone idle git!'

'No need to pity me: I'm a lone wolf by choice...'

'Why don't you come over tonight and we'll watch the game together?'

Summer Sketches - Thirty-two degrees!!!...

'This T V guide is a repeat of the one published in July last year.'

Sloth Compensating

School of Get Up and Go