Starting To Live Alone T-Shirts

Rental Agency. Yes, I want a single apartment. If I wanted to live with someone, I'd live in a togetherment! (Published originally on Jan. 24, 1995.)

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"Yes, I'm alone."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

"He says he's not running away. . . he's just going off the grid."

"Thanks, but I already have my 'support bubble' right here."

"At a certain point, I bring them back."

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

Thanksgiving 2020

'How animals mark their territory'

"'Happily ever after' you want? Then you keep the house kosher!"

Affordable housing - Mum and Dads.

'As a bachelor I have to wash my own clothes, clean my own room. The do it all again three months later.'

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

I think my girlfriend is moving in.

'It was your typical student flat: dirty dishes, broken furniture, grubby carpet and cracks in the walls'

"Nothing personal - I'm through with the male brain."

Augmented reality check

She hated first dates. She always ended up sounding desperate.

"Since no family can come this year, I thought I'd invite you to dinner instead."

'Dear Dairy, Well... I met someone, and I think she could be Mrs. Alright.'

"I'd love to, but I have a million lonely ritualistic things I need to do."

"Cute... But way too young."

'This is the fourth single woman to attack the Valentine's display this week.'

Desert Island Zoom Support Group.

"I feel icky...oh, so icky"

"As a single diner, you will be seated at an awkward table by the restrooms where your lonely presence won't bother other diners."

"When you're single, you're neither loved nor hated."

Are you eating properly?

"Mom, Dad, is my old room ready? It will be nice to take a few years off and rest."

"When I ask myself out, I always say yesh...."

'The date didn't go too well. I should have taken her to a place that had more challenging placemats.'

A man irons one of his pant legs.