Starting Private School Gifts

'Son, I've arranged for you to go to a private school where you'll have a wonderful time!'

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

"Abstract Expressionism is definitely right for me at this stage of my career."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

'What a drive! Our boy's going to go a long, long way.'

Culture Saturday

Boy and girl at thier studies

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

Being and Nothingness Pop-Up! (book)

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?