Stand-up Comedy Critic Pillows

Recycling centre with a bin for Jim Davidson videos.

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

They hated me.

Zombie standup

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

Snowprov

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

"So...what are you doing after you graduate?"

Stand-up Romcom

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

"Someone throw him a punchline!"

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

"Amateurs."

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

Stand-up comic/ceo: 'A funny thing happened on the way to the board meeting...'

Feline Stand Up - 'Fetching...how dumb is that? And another thing I don't understand...what's with all that TAIL WAGGING?'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

Non Thought For The Day.

Ranked Voting in N.Y.C.

"I stand corrected. Hard as you try, sometimes you just can't find the humor in a situation."

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

"The script isn't funny, but maybe if we put some unfunny actors in it and get an unfunny director it will be funny."

"It's tough to get him moving, but once he's going he never stops."

"I don't like lawyer jokes. Lawyers don't think they're funny and other people don't think they're jokes."