Stage Mom Gifts

'I'm afraid the exploratory operation on your son has exposed no talent.'

Sign says 'Caution - Children at Play' and they are.

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

'They all want to play the star.'

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

Theatre Masks and Butts

Taking a peek at the audience

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

Falstaff

"Toi Toi Toi!"

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"Just when you're about to lose faith in humanity, you see Shakespeare in the Park."

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

Ladies

Jack-a-box in the theatre.

"Does my bum look big in this aria?"

Woman crying with happiness.

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

"A glimpse into a cartoon character's dressing room..."

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

Mensa Does Improv

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

Waving from Behind the Curtain

'I'm a star!'