Stable Squad Gifts

'I checked, they say acorns cause liver poisoning so the answer is 'no'.'

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Braiding a Horse's Tail

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Little girl dangling from her horse track.

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

A pony throws its rider.

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. X.

Horse Clean-up

Never clip him yourself unless you are an expert.

Cleaning the Horse

'So....how many hours were you practising half pass this morning?'

Begin by removing all surplus mud.

'Mom, I think it's time I graduated to a full size horse.'

'I don't set the rules, but you do need to accept that you're a pony and move on Brian!'

'Lost again. I hope you kept a diary of your trip.'

Pommel Horse Poops.

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

"I used to be a racer: Giving people joy-rides is really really boring..."

"This way, O' Brien."

Horse Muzzles

'I've fallen and I can't giddyup.'

'Where's my saddle, you sick freak?'

'Gee, Doctor Dresher, you have a wonderful way with horses....

'This is my latest sculpture in compacted poo. I call it 'got the trots'.'

'The holes in this hay net are getting smaller! What are you trying to say buddy?!'

'You're putting that saddle on backwards.' - 'How do you know which way I'm going?'

"What a time for it to go on the bunk!"

The new groom is a very young boy who says he ought to understand horses because he has been amongst them all his life

'You gotta be kidding me!'

'How's your job at the stables?' - 'I'd better dash. My work is piling up.'

'Those stretching exercises you have been practicing are really working!'

'Cool poo stain tattoo Robert!'

'Our small humans have groomed us for an hour, we're in the field, what shall we do first Maurice?'