Squid Enthusiasts Pillows

"Be warned, Gummo hates it when his work is misinterpreted."

"It says here you allow service animals. This is my emotional support squid."

Horror movies

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

Myths and legends...

'Sorry, everyone. That last chart kind of startled me.'

''What's in the bag, lady?''

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Man! That squirrel was jacked!"

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

Come on Darling: Surely, you don't need a sledgehammer to crack a nut...

Cat eats date.

'Of course I'm squirreling away money!'

"I meant the dog!"

Goldfish evolution - "...it's called evolution and it means in a few years we'll walk right out that door."

"I've been getting really excited about squirrels even when my dog isn't with me."

'My dentist recommended it.'

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

"If I have this peanut in my pocket, it means I must have buried my keys!"

"Consider yourself chased."

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

'Jimmie,it's not nice to call someone a bigmouth.'

"OK, she's back. Just start slowly, and remember to ask her about herself."

"I'm just making a few behavioral notes in my journal, then I'll chase him."

"You're not goin' anywhere, Roy. You buried your own nuts again."

Sooners! Opening day of fishing.