Spot-loving Story Seekers Pillows

'I like it.'

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

"This, Yorik... Do you know him well?"

"Please, Daddy, just one more conspiracy theory."

"It's not for you, it's for the paparazzi."

Bookworm Romance

"Oh you kids and that cursed painting in the closet keep me young."

Frenchman Speaking to Englishman

Sauce close to the PM.

"I'm a little disappointed that we didn't get any human specimens, but I think our leaders will be quite pleased with the snow globe and the commemorative spoon."

"I couldn't be happier if I were in slop."

'Empty your pockets and go through again.'

'Last cruise I ever take! Stuck with the same people for three weeks...'

"There's nothing much happening tonight... so I'm going to just talk about myself!"

Ah-Choo!

"When your father was your age, he saw a tiny spider in that cave and made a wee-wee in his pants."

Goodnight Moon

'What would you say about me having my spots enlarged?'

For Sale - The rights to my story.

Schlock Holmes

The Galaxy's Guide to Hitchhikers...Paul McCartney.

Let's start a book group to read stuff that will help us cope with our lives. Like? You know: Self-help books on housekeeping, child-rearing and navigating difficult workplace situations. Suggestions? Yeah. Jane Eyre, Gone with the Wind and The Devil Wears Prada. The great books series.

'I don't care if you only need the eye. You'll have to buy the whole newt!'

"No, we're putting the children through as luggage"

'Braveheart is one of your ancestors? And why the heck don't you look like Mel Gibson??'

"If anyone wants me I'll be on the shop floor strutting my stuff."

'Have we found a scandal in here?'

"Fiction or non-fiction?"

Absent Friends Reunited.

Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip.

'Forget about 'The little engine that could'. Tell me about 'The search engine that could'.'

It was the harshest job interviews Peter had ever attended...