Sporty Spectator Pillows

"We're speeding up the game by replacing the seventh inning with the 'Ring' cycle."

'Heads up!!'

'I only come to the game for the half time entertainment and snack bar privileges.'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

If nobody had invented graphics

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"I AM at my usual position."

Football Chameleon

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

A day at the transgenic races

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

A married couple share the same pole vault.

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

"How should we divide the teams?"

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Ratminton

Saving a Heart

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

Gary turns 40.

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

The best PE teacher in the World.