Sports Metaphor Lover Pillows

'She had a no-hitter going until I snuck up on her!'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Alternative fielding positions

"... It's just that, when you said you had a couple of tickets to see the big game..."

"You're a great team player - so we're trading you."

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

Golf Hole at bottom of lake.

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

"Either accept the pay reduction or you get sent down to the minors."

'And remember...no sudden moves in the shoot out.'

'We need more points in the paint.'

Free Speech has heavy price.

So you're wearing a bag over your head because you're ashamed of your team?' 'It's a cloaking device.'

"Of course my main concern is how the situation in Eastern Europe will affect the pennant race."

Executive Coach: Specializing in sports metaphores.

"Sure, Pop, I see the ball—what I don't see are incentives."

'Looks like I might have to rethink the football idea!'

"Just to set the record straight, I'm leaving you because you never turn your body to the net, you don't have a smooth swing, and because your forehand, backhand, and volley are inadequate!"

Organically Grown Athlete - Guaranteed free of chemicals.

'Agreed then? Your boy takes a dive in the fifth...'

Group showers. Just one of the reasons few golfers take up football.

'Well, here's your answer, Schluman. How can I possible promote you to district sales manager if you can't even palm a basketball?'

Coulda Woulda Shoulda.

"You can't beat Channel 5's sport coverage."

'I'm glad for this companies emphasis on team work. They said I'm not getting laid off - just traded.'

The Thinking Man's Rugby

'When pastors take sports analogies too far...'

"The match fixers are making it a bit obvious."

'OK, you're all set. That stent in your artery will get you through the second half, but I'll need to open you back up after the game.'

"This could have been an e-mail."