Sports Marathoner Gifts

37 years in the same position.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Storm in the out tray

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

Surfing the daily stress

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

Check your universal remote control at the door.

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

"You're doing great, only thirty-one more years to go."

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

"I told him he should have trained more."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

Binge Watch

Succession 2

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

Cross-country runners picking up water and spare batteries.

401K

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."