Sports Enthusiasts Pillows

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin playing hockey. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore."

Xena: Warrior Princess, TV star, professional volleyball player.

'Swelling, Babcock, is our body's way of telling us that something's wrong. But if you insist on staying in the game, hey, it's your elbow.'

'Remember that summer we coached little league?'

I like the Jets...I guess

'My husband wants to know if the sonogram can tell if the baby is a Red Sox or Yankees fan.'

'Remember kids, school sports isn't just about winning - it's also about some serious after-school peer domination!'

The Hound of the Basketballs.

Pole Vaulting in Hurdle Race

"Most of the apostles can make it but Thomas is doubtful"

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

"We've just paid £10million, so your salary will be £3.75.. "

'It appears to be a legitimate restraining order. . .'

Seating arrangements.

Fake wheelchair user.

"It's a jungle out there!"

"Let's have a clean fight and no hitting below the belt."

'Go long!'

There's a time and a place for the 'boxers vs. briefs' debate.'

Chicken, cow and pig playing American Football...chicken lays an egg and cow carries on playing.

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'Divorce Court' "It's a rather crude system but the customers seem to like it"

"Yeah, actually, we did need you to come in today."

Octopus and Kangaroo face-off

'She'll be okay. She just had her bell rung.'

"Let's talk salary. How does Premier League footballer sound to you?"

"Let's divide the teams into back pain vs. leg pain."

'Well, I've stopped racing professionally you see, so I can enjoy good food at long last...'

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

'Don't be such a sour loser.'

'Shoulda bet on the underdogs!'

Sports Day at the Monastery

"Not to diminish what you've achieved in the last eighteen months of training, but it appears that the javelin roll is not an Olympic sport."

'I'll be Manchester United - you can be the Glazer family.'