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Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'The fish and chips are very nice.'

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

'To avoid possible schism, a period of careful reflection is needed before changing the light-bulb.'

"...And don't give me that 'I hope his precious little Blackhawks lose' look either!"

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

Spelling a newspaper

"I don'y know about you guys, but I don't feel like I've lost one goddamn bit of my feminity."

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

"I just completely disagree with what you just said about America lacking focus."

'What did He do before he was God?'

'How are we supposed to think the unthinkable if we have to drink the drinkable?'

'Big Issue...'

"The problem is: reasonable men may differ on what the hell reason is!"

'Crisis? Which crisis?'

Huge support for focus groups etc but nobody at the political meeting

"Free speech" does not mean your ignorance is equivalent to our knowledge!

"I hate arguing with someone who knows what they're talking about."

Uni. Snowflake Library

"Oh I don't think it's as bad as all that. In fact, I think we're in the golden age of something which we won't even realize it's the golden age of until many years from now."

"Hey Dad? Are we still atheists?"

'Thank you for calling the bullpen,,, To continue in English, Press one,,,'

'You got a problem with that call? Do ya, Coach? Well I call 'em the way I see 'em!'

"Do you know how masculine it is to risk crying?"

"We're a bit polarized here, I'm afraid. Ingrid wants to invade Haiti, I don't."

Meet Larry; tenor, baritone, philosopher, social commentator, sport analyst, political expert, relationship expert … and A+ certified plumber.

'You know, when you get right down to it, most consequences are unintended.'

Impressive opinions you can pass off as your own (Entertaining at Dinner Parties).