Debating Sports T-Shirts

'Where's the evidence keeping us out?'

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

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"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

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"You're fired."

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

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'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Vote Centrist to Keep Things Exactly as Awful as They Are

"Away with the warmonger!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Annual run-off at the mouth.

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What's normal?

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

Political convention

Ahem. I'm eating. Not now, please. Just one tiny question. Believers I American exceptionalism have always said we're the paragon of democracy. So I'm just wondering … How come one party is passing unnecessary laws that'll keep millions of us from voting? They're robbing us of our voice! Could've surprised me.

Dialogue