Sports Betting Pillows

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

'Sometimes you just can't win.', 'Win, nothing -- I can't even beat the point spread!'

'Well, at least we beat the point spread.'

'Racing form on wall' -"Thunder lad is the only horse with a chance.. I've been following him all season."

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

"He's a great stock picker, but he's lousy at picking the office sports pools."

"They found me guilty, but I beat the point spread!"

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

'We're in international waters now, so let's do this. You still want the Giants over the Dodgers for five bucks, right?'

Horse racing is the only sport where a 3 year old can make an adult behave like a baby!

'Okay, maybe I was defeated for re-election, but at least I beat the point spread!'

Doug adds a whole new dimension to the March Madness office pool.

Pools Winners

I've never seen anyone so confident about a race!

'I'll take Tommy Peters to cry first, for a nickel.'

Sports Wagering. Over/Under Window. I'm absolutely positive I'll win by betting the combined points in the game will be more than 200! That's "over-confidence"!

'What's the odds on Cheltenham going ahead?'

'I think the guy in the black trunks is going to take a dive.' (he has Titanic tattoo on his chest).

"...I know it's Monday morning, but I'm too tired for work!"

-Could you hurry please... I need it for the first race at Newmarket (at the bank loan desk).

'Sometimes you just can't win.', 'Win, nothing -- I can't even beat the point spread!'

"Okay so that's $5,000 on the Cubs to win the World Series and $5,000 on the Lions to win the Super Bowl. So tell me, how long you beenan economic forecaster for the Department of Commerce?"

'Sometimes you just can't win.', 'Win, nothing -- I can't even beat the point spread!'

A foolish and a betting man.

Rival Jockeys

Little league world series of poker.

A day at the races

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

'Come on, I dare you: I say you can't drink a whole dew drop...'

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

'I don't like to take chances.'

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."